Friday, October 05, 2007

You Can't Make This Stuff Up!

From Crooks and Liars

I swear you can’t write this stuff, but guess what (GOP Senator) Larry Craig’s favorite recipe is? A Super Tuber. A baked potato with a hot dog crammed inside.

I also read a post where Lavvy was referred to as Senator Tappy McWidestance.


Tuesday, October 02, 2007

Another headline you would pay to have drop in your lap...


Anti-Gay Penis-Pumping Judge Loses Appeal

(Oklahoma City, Oklahoma)

The Oklahoma Court of Criminal Appeals has upheld the conviction of a former judge who was caught using a penis pump in court as he was presiding over a trial.

Former District Judge Donald Thompson was sentenced in August 2006 to
four years in prison on four counts of indecent exposure.

Thompson appealed, arguing that during his trial the pump should not have been allowed into evidence. He claimed in the appeal that the pump was severely damaged and the trial judge should not have allowed to be demonstrated in court "as if it did work."

The Court of Appeals ruled that a "sufficient chain of custody was established for admission of a penis pump."

Thompson, a Republican who had sat on the bench for 23 years, was charged in 2005 with three felony counts of indecent exposure after a court reporter complained to authorities that he was using the pump in her full view. (story)

At the time, Thompson was presiding over a murder trial. Thompson had a reputation for handing out stiff sentences. He once tried to send a man to prison for life for spitting on a police officer.

Prior to becoming the Republican judge he served six years in the state House of Representatives starting in 1975 where he frequently spoke out against gays.Thompson was removed from the bench while the allegations against him were investigated. The charges were laid by Oklahoma Attorney General Drew Edmondson in an official complaint.

Thompson was caught in the act on numerous occasions by the court
clerk and trial witnesses the complaint said.

Thompson allegedly shaved his pubic area, applied lube, and slipped on the pump, using it until he climaxed.

Penis pumps are reputed to enhance the size of the organ and are often used in masturbation.The complaint also said that Thompson, 57, masturbated on a number of occasions in full view of Lisa K. Foster, Thompson's court reporter for 15 years.

Foster said she first started hearing a noise that “sounded like a blood pressure cuff being pumped up.” Foster told investigators she witnessed the judge’s sexual behavior “fifteen to twenty times.”

Thompson fired her after hearing she had cooperated with the investigation into his misconduct. At trial, Judge C. Allen McCall rejected motions to suppress the pump, prevent the jury from hearing testimony that a second "penis pump" was seen under Thompson's bench, and block the jury from hearing about 180 hours of courtroom tapes that contained the whooshing sound of the penis pump in use.